All Is Grace

this morning, as we puttered around the kitchen over breakfast and baby and dog interruptions and simmering stir fry, Bryson commented, “it feels like Saturday.” he sat finishing up his chocolate chip pancakes and laughing about how sore his abs were from the pull-ups and push-ups he did on Monday (out of his norm, but part of something he wants to do). Laine walked over to me bouncing up and down, “can i start learning again now, please??? (this after yesterday’s, “Permission to commence learning” request) and after making her protein smoothie…off she went. to wrap herself in saran wrap and duct tape (well, actually i did that to her) for future use as a personal dress form. it is after noon and she is completely engrossed. Reasa sat down at the computer at 8:15 to design her schedule for the day in excel form…because she’s my structured checklist girl. and i’m ok with that (except that she’s only doing it out of fear. but that’s another blog post. oy.).

to give you some background, Monday morning we started “unschooling” after our “conversation.” each one of the kids responded very differently to this conversation…Bryson mostly didn’t know what to do with it. it just didn’t make sense to him. how could school be that…free? (we call this response whatever) Laine took it as her ticket to pursue the things she can never actually get to because the school checklist never gets done before the day is over (so, we call that joy). Reasa…panicked because she could never possibly learn enough to go to college without a completely designed schedule (and this one would be freaking out).

so. on the recommendation of a new (unschooling) friend…we talked about some general daily guidelines to get us started. any kind of panic from them does not strike me as…positive. we have a regimented history this year…and to go from regimented to NOTHING seems counterintuitive. the general guidelines given were as follows:

1) Read each day. (no time limit. no required books. no required subject.)
2) Move each day. (at least 30 minutes. don’t care what kind of movement. yoga. running up and down stairs. weight lifting. walking on the treadmill. just. move.)
3) Math each day. (don’t care what kind. Kahn Academy, current curriculum, find new stuff, whatever.)
4) Blog each day. (set up a new blog, share it as desired, but must share with me. learning log included–“today…i learned this.” or “these are the things i did throughout my day” and hopefully including something they came away with. but…not me saying “you are required to learn something significant to report to me each day.”)

it’s day 3 and each kid has completed each thing (with the exception of Reasa’s “move each day” on Monday…because the dvd got stuck in the wii and we couldn’t remove it and dinner happened and then i forgot a coffee date and she had to finish other things while i was gone and…well, it just didn’t happen.) each day. and has done things he or she wanted to do each day. and has learned things they never would have encountered with our last-week’s curriculum…each day. have the girls learned the specifics of what happened in a whaling ship in the mid 1800’s like they would have? nope. has Bryson struggled through reading 3 chapters of a (very, very dry–especially to my boy who hates to read unless he loves the content) book written from the perspective of an Egyptian slave to supplement the reading from the history book in his lesson plans? no.

but you know what’s funny? each kid got to the end of the day tired and happy (both have been issues in the past). we fought less. i scolded less. when i asked everyone to take a break from what they were doing and walk through the house to do a general pick-up before Joey got home from work…there was no whining, no argument. Laine, who typically leaves disaster in her wake because she tries to do 9 things at a time…cleaned up the sewing project she completed before she moved on to painting. i didn’t even have to remind her it would need to be done. she finished the project before something else came up in her mind…i think because she knew she would have the opportunity to do the next thing without feeling like she had to cram everything in her head into two hours. each kid had something to say to me each night:

“you know what’s cool, Mom? i can cosplay while i learn now!” (ouch.)
“i felt like i learned something today, Mom. i didn’t feel like i was drowning in stuff that’s going nowhere.”
“i think i can make that server now, Mom. i found a tutorial…”
“can we do today again tomorrow?”

i’m not sitting here telling you that we are doing this right. or that it’s perfect. or that i think every day will be without complaint or argument or fighting (as i sit next to Reasa who is beating herself up and impatient with me while i attempt to help her solve simultaneous equations by substitution…because it’s on her personal checklist today). but i will tell you i am not trying to come to any actual conclusions this week. we talked this morning about having our days feel like a whole bunch of Saturdays…maybe for a month. maybe for two. we’ll talk about it as we go. and our unschooling will never look like yours. and it might never look like something you would even respect. and, well, you know what?

i don’t think i really care.