All Is Grace

as in -thyroidism.

i own that now.

i have looked at the symptoms and the treatments and the science behind this for probably two years now, always thinking, “huh. those symptoms sound like me,” but never really admitting that it could warrant testing (and, hello, no health insurance). to be honest, I’ve been saying, “noooo, this is not me–it couldn’t possibly be that easy” for so long, it’s become annoying. to myself, of course. because i never say it out loud. and in the past three months when i have, i’ve always qualified it with “i’m sure there’s nothing wrong. that i’m dreaming this. and it can’t be that easy for real.”

i even had the blood tests Monday and said to Joey when i got home, “it won’t be anything. it’s not my thyroid. i’m just being lazy.”

hmm.

what’s interesting is that the follow-up conversation with the doctor yesterday went something like this: “so, we got your bloodwork back, and your TSH levels are slightly elevated. a normal range is somewhere between .4 and 4.5. you are at a 6.3. this is something that falls within the borderline range, but i think treating it, considering your family history, wouldn’t be a bad idea. what pharmacy do you normally use?” she quickly explained that they would follow with blood work in six weeks to make sure the dosage was correct, and that they didn’t over-correct with the medicaation…

…but that was it.

today the paperwork arrived. there is nothing more in the paperwork regarding hypothyroidism or what i should do to take care of myself with this potentially being part of my life. this comes after the conversation in her office about the fact that i’m carrying extra weight which puts me in an “overweight” BMI range…but that “because of my genetic predisoposition to be the shape that i am, i may just have to get used to it, especially considering that i work out an hour a day, every day.” let me also add that my cholesterol is 215–considered “borderline” (oh, and it’s higher than my almost-60-year-old-nearly-menopausal mother’s cholesterol…and higher than my 62-year-old dad’s), and my calcium is low. the recommendations on the paperwork? 1200mg of Calcium and 800 IU of Vitamin D daily, reduce saturated fat and cholesterol consumption, and continue my regular aerobic exercise routine.

i think my experience is normal. no recommended steps to take for overall health with an underactive thyroid, no recommendation as to what a healthy cholesterol level should be or what it could affect if i didn’t take care of it (she didn’t actually even tell me it was a concern–just that it was borderline). just a prescription for thyroxine, and calcium/Vitamin D additions. i could be taking for granted the fact that she knows i research my health on my own, or that because i didn’t have questions for her, she figured i already knew…but…we live in a society which is obese. a society completely reliant upon medication and supplementation and which possesses very, very little knowledge about real health and well-being. is it a mistake for her to assume that i know?

considering the fact that i have spent much of the past 24 hours gathering vast amounts of unknown-to-me information regarding hypothyroidism, weight loss with hypothyroidism, supplementation/nutritional considerations for hypothyroidism, high cholesterol, fitness and nutrition aimed at preventing and treating all of these things…and i’ve barely scratched the surface, i’m sure…that assumption seems a bit misguided.

i guess it’s an opportunity for me to own my health. if more people would step up and do the same, doctors could assume that their patients would do what was right for their bodies–ask the right questions, follow through, take responsibility. but this often isn’t happening.  people hear the word “borderline” and think, “oh, i’m still ok. if i just keep doing what i’m doing, borderline will stay borderline and i’ll be fine.” i hear “borderline” and freak out…but my goal is wellness. for a very long time. i don’t think i’m that different from a lot of people where that is concerned…but i hope i’m more proactive.

i guess time will tell.

about six weeks, actually. then another year and we’ll see about that cholesterol level. in the meantime, i’ve got work to do. and a date with my treadmill this afternoon.